Heteronormativity is embedded in our faith institutions, our laws, our schooling, family practices, media, and workspaces. This norm enables parents to perpetuate the oppressive practices to their own children.
Goal: To create affirmative spaces for LGBTQ children in their homes first, so they can be better equipped to thrive in their society and the world at large.
Time expected: 30 – 45 mins
Materials needed: Honesty, courage, pen & paper are optional
Participants: Parent(s) & child(ren)
Objective 1: Check your beliefs (Parents, do this section alone)
- Question 1: What did you hear about this as a child from your family, from society?
- Question 2: What do you believe now?
- Question 3: How do I want others to treat my child?
Objective 2: Check your actions (Do with your child & ask their input)
- Question 1: How do I show support & affirm my child’s existence and being?
- Question 2: How do I oppose or minimize their truth?
- Question 3: What new behaviors do I want to implement?
Objective 3: Check your environment (Do with your child & ask for their input)
- Question 1: Are you inviting to others your child knows or brings around?
- Question 2: Am I open to talking about this on an ongoing basis?
- Question 3: Can your child talk to you about their relationships, their life, themselves?
**If you’ve answered no to any of these questions, spend more time sifting through objectives 1 & 2 until you create a foundation of love & acceptance of your child. Only move onto Objective 4 when you have allowed acceptance and love to take over fear.
Objective 4: Create an affirmative space (Do w/your child)
- Task 1: Identify other LGBTQ people you love, admire, are successful who have similarities to your child.
- Task 2: Write down at least 10 attributes of your child and share it with them.
- Task3: Have your child write an affirmation for themselves. An affirmation is a thought, a belief you know to be true and want to embody.
For example: “I am divinely & uniquely created;” “I walk in my purpose;” “Everything that happens is for my good;” “God loves me, this I know”
Say it to your child every time before they leave your presence.
If you want to go a step further, type it up, and tape it to a common area such as the refrigerator door or bathroom mirror.
I am so glad you and the child were brave enough to peel back the layers that have blocked love and decided to come together to create a more loving environment for both/all of you. You all deserve it!