From Pain to Prosperity: How to Overcome Money Trauma

By Reverend Twana Malone 

As with all traumas, money trauma runs deep, and we are often unaware that we have it. We might say that we have money problems, but not money trauma, which forms when we take on the beliefs that others have about money. We might have heard from others that money is evil or that you must work hard for money, and that becomes our belief (often, a belief that goes unchecked). 

In my immediate family, when my father got paid on Friday, he would gamble his money and regularly come home with nothing to provide for his family. These experiences can translate into a story of being unworthy, or a story of lack and limitation– “there is not enough, or I am not enough.” As a result, we hold onto the little we have; we always take and don’t give, we withhold from others, or we may be unable to receive.

The story I told myself –and still do at times– is that bad things happen because of money. People do hurtful things because of money. Therefore, money must be evil. Money is always at the center of the story for almost everything that bothers me about or connects me to another (parent, sibling, spouse, etc.). Another story is that anyone who shares their money with me must want something from me. Both stories come from a limited perspective, often with many important pieces missing from the story.

So, how do we begin to heal our money trauma? 

The first thing to do is to start to develop an awareness of your personal money story. You can’t change anything you are unaware of, and we often need support identifying our stories. 

Once aware, you have the power to think greater than your current situation allows, which can transform your relationship with money.  We must begin to affirm our worthiness by remembering that no other sentient being has a problem with receiving and begin to accept that abundance is our birthright.  

Finally, we must begin the practice of forgiving, being clear about what we need and desire –  sharing, tithing, and doing good with the good we have. Most people don’t know what they need or desire. 

When we do this, we open ourselves up to receive more.